Valve Releases Aperture Investment Opportunity #3

Aperture answers all of your burning questions about their talking turret technology.

Valve has posted the third video in its series of hilarious Portal 2 ads.  This latest “Aperture Investment Opportunity” features Aperture President and CEO Cave Johnson announcing a brand new product line.  It seems that the faux company has developed a consumer version of its beloved talking turrets.  Regardless of why it is that we’re so in love with something that is programmed to shoot at us, MTB plans to order a few for its executive offices.

The video takes viewers inside the tech of the the automated weapons and answers several questions that you’ve probably always wondered about video game turret science.  In the video below, Johnson explains the absurdly complicated ridiculously simple manner in which Aperture stows a seemingly endless supply of bullets into these things.  He also details the company’s ingenious method of staying ahead of the competition by firing off the entire bullet (including the casing).  Brilliant!

There used to be an embeded media player here, but it doesn't work anymore. We blame the Tumbeasts.

Image courtesy of Half-Life Wikia

Nick Santangelo
Nick Santangelo
Nick Santangelo

MASH Veteran

Nick has been a gamer since the 8-bit days and a member of the MTB editorial team since January of 2011. He is not to be interrupted while questing his way through an RPG or desperately clinging to hope against all reason that his Philly sports teams will win any given game he may be watching. Seriously folks, reading this acknowledges that you relieve MTB of any and all legal liability for his actions.

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